I recently watched a video made by BuzzFeed Parents, thanks Tu Anh Quach Schroeter that discussed how we compliment girls. Instead of focusing on their looks we should focus on how smart they are and what activities they enjoy. That had me thinking, why do some women have such a hard time taking compliments?
What is a compliment?
Noun ~ an expression of praise, commendation, or admiration. *
Verb ~ to show kindness or regard for by a gift or other favor. *
Now that you know what a compliment is, why is it so hard to accept one? Have you ever seen a friend deny a compliment? Or worse, watch them return a compliment because they feel like they have too?
I was at some event (Girl Scouts, I think) and the speaker was talking about taking compliments and how we should accept them and say, “Thank You”. That sounds simplistic and it really is. If nothing else, use your manners and say thank you.
What stuck with me was WHY we should say “Thank You”. Think about the last compliment you gave your best friend or significant other. Were you making it up? Did you want something in return? Did you want a compliment back? Most people will answer no, you didn’t expect anything back. More than likely, you were being thoughtful, you wanted them to know you noticed or you wanted them to feel good about themselves.
So why would you want to downplay a compliment you receive? What impression are you giving to that person? They could interpret it as; your opinion doesn’t count or I don’t believe you. What makes this even worse, these are the same people we usually go to when we need someone else’s opinion about other things in our life.
Take the challenge and accept compliments this week! Then do it again next week. Remember this is their opinion of how they see you and that’s a good thing.